9.20.2009

New Moon reveals bittersweet truths

Sometimes plans fall through. Today was such a time. More like today was an extension of last night where all that was right was wrong- which turned out to be right. This is good. There are other thoughts that float past leading to another path- one which I'm not so confident about understanding, or accepting.

Most times I reflect & feel so fortunate that my father taught, without overtly teaching, me to be so independent & forward thinking. Why do I suddenly feel it necessary to consider the counter-experience? Why does the new moon reveal such bittersweet truths this moon phase? Why is Norah Jones' "turn me on" playing in the background? The starry sky tonight driving home from Kihei seems somehow a reminder- mocking me. All the stars laid witness to my thoughts.. listening while the night breeze cloaked me into a crisp realization that all is not what it seems.

The bewitching hours, once again. It's always this time of night where life always strikes me as being most enriched. I always enjoy listening to Chaka Khan in these moments. That's one beautiful sister. Why do my father's words ring true? Why do Chaka's songs sting so much sometimes? The weight of this knowledge crushes my lungs right now. Why is there no rain tonight to drown out the sounds of the stars beckoning me outside to ponder their brilliance? Luring me w/their luminescent charms- I'll have none of it tonight because this new moon, this new moon feels distant & unresponsive- or perhaps actually more responsive in its unresponsiveness that it screams truths to me- bittersweet truths.